738. Forget that this is the morning that the cleaning lady is coming and wrench your back while bolting up the stairs to your room upon hearing her key in the lock, because you were working in the basement at your computer in your underwear.
737. Leave the impression that a graphic story about wrenching your back while bolting up stairs was about you instead of about someone else.
736. Leave the impression that a graphic story about wrenching your back while bolting up stairs was about someone else instead of about you.
Nov 30, 2006
Nov 17, 2006
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
786. Discover after getting to work that you still have your wife's keys in her pocket, borrowed the evening before.
785. Drop your toast on the floor.
784. Forget to dim your high-beams.
783. Or forget to turn them on.
782. Criticize the speck in another's eye when you have a log in your own (see the Gospels).
781. Forget to call someone back.
780. When going to a picnic, remember the pie but forget the serving utensil.
779. Mak a typo.
778. Shoot into the other team's goal.
777. Gamble on Friday the 13th.
776. Lose your winning lottery ticket.
775. Erase a phone message before you've heard it.
774. Fail to call ahead and find out that the office is closed on Wednesdays.
773. Put off getting your flu shot until all the serum is gone.
772. Put your underwear on backwards.
771. Get a (Raindrops keep falling) tune (on my) stuck in your (head) head.
770. Forget the coupon at home that made you go to the restaurant in the first place.
769. Jump your turn at a four-way stop sign.
768. Wear your shoes on the wrong feet.
766. Drop your contact lens in your coffee.
765. Spray when you talk.
764. Walk when it says "Don't walk."
763. Muff your number when counting off by threes.
762. Forget to pay a bill.
761. Overdress.
760. Underdress.
759. Fail to close a door completely.
758. Type in ww. instead of www.
757. Forget to give your kid lunch money.
756. Forget your lunch.
755. Leave your shoes where someone will trip over them.
754. Leave your shoes where you will trip over them.
753. Forget to take one last look in the mirror.
752. Forget your notes.
751. Leave the seat up.
750. Fail to get out of the way when changing a boy's diaper.
749. Leave chocolate where your dog can get it.
748. Grab a cat by the tail.
747. Burn toast.
746. Open a milk carton on the wrong side.
745. Buy a cat.
744. Roll a gutterball.
743. Forget to get your car inspected.
742. Go on red.
741. Stop on green.
740. Forget to feed the goldfish.
739. Forget to put out the trash.
785. Drop your toast on the floor.
784. Forget to dim your high-beams.
783. Or forget to turn them on.
782. Criticize the speck in another's eye when you have a log in your own (see the Gospels).
781. Forget to call someone back.
780. When going to a picnic, remember the pie but forget the serving utensil.
779. Mak a typo.
778. Shoot into the other team's goal.
777. Gamble on Friday the 13th.
776. Lose your winning lottery ticket.
775. Erase a phone message before you've heard it.
774. Fail to call ahead and find out that the office is closed on Wednesdays.
773. Put off getting your flu shot until all the serum is gone.
772. Put your underwear on backwards.
771. Get a (Raindrops keep falling) tune (on my) stuck in your (head) head.
770. Forget the coupon at home that made you go to the restaurant in the first place.
769. Jump your turn at a four-way stop sign.
768. Wear your shoes on the wrong feet.
766. Drop your contact lens in your coffee.
765. Spray when you talk.
764. Walk when it says "Don't walk."
763. Muff your number when counting off by threes.
762. Forget to pay a bill.
761. Overdress.
760. Underdress.
759. Fail to close a door completely.
758. Type in ww. instead of www.
757. Forget to give your kid lunch money.
756. Forget your lunch.
755. Leave your shoes where someone will trip over them.
754. Leave your shoes where you will trip over them.
753. Forget to take one last look in the mirror.
752. Forget your notes.
751. Leave the seat up.
750. Fail to get out of the way when changing a boy's diaper.
749. Leave chocolate where your dog can get it.
748. Grab a cat by the tail.
747. Burn toast.
746. Open a milk carton on the wrong side.
745. Buy a cat.
744. Roll a gutterball.
743. Forget to get your car inspected.
742. Go on red.
741. Stop on green.
740. Forget to feed the goldfish.
739. Forget to put out the trash.
Nov 15, 2006
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
794. Mix up dead batteries with fresh batteries.
793. Fail to notice the dish baking in the oven before you shut it off.
792. Cut the flower along with the weed.
791. Step on the teeth of a rake so that the handle swings up and hits you.
790. Take a slice from the pie that was meant for the school bake sale.
789. Change the schedule for a business meeting but forget to tell the people who are coming.
788. Show up for a conference on the wrong weekend.
787. Overuse a phrase, if you know what I mean.
793. Fail to notice the dish baking in the oven before you shut it off.
792. Cut the flower along with the weed.
791. Step on the teeth of a rake so that the handle swings up and hits you.
790. Take a slice from the pie that was meant for the school bake sale.
789. Change the schedule for a business meeting but forget to tell the people who are coming.
788. Show up for a conference on the wrong weekend.
787. Overuse a phrase, if you know what I mean.
Nov 12, 2006
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
800. Drop a roll of paper towels into the sink.
799. Drop a roll of toilet paper into the toilet.
798. Discover that you've bought everything you need to paint a wall except the paint.
797. Spill paint.
796. Go into a job interview forgetting that you temporarily loosened your tie.
795. Go to great care to prepare a document and then lose it to the wind.
799. Drop a roll of toilet paper into the toilet.
798. Discover that you've bought everything you need to paint a wall except the paint.
797. Spill paint.
796. Go into a job interview forgetting that you temporarily loosened your tie.
795. Go to great care to prepare a document and then lose it to the wind.
Nov 6, 2006
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
850. Change lanes without signalling.
849. Forget to dim your lights.
848. Let eggshell fall in with the eggs.
847. Lose the wedding ring.
846. Forget your ... uh ... you know, your ... oh, yeah—your point!
845. Staple your finger.
844. Open the wrong side of the milk carton.
843. Burn your marshmallow.
842. Drop the toothpicks.
841. Or the sequins.
840. Or the ball bearings.
839. Belabor your point.
837. Beat a dead horse.
836. Make an analogy that's as bad as a popsicle in the rain.
834. Cut yourself opening a can.
833. Blow out the candle along with the match.
832. Hit a rock with the mower.
831. Cut yourself shaving.
830. Put your T-shirt on backwards.
829. Wear a T-shirt with graphics that shows through your dress shirt.
828. Pull out the gaz nozzle while it's still pumping.
827. Miss a check in your checkbook.
826. Forget to sign a check.
825. Accidentally throw the check in the trash.
824. Men, go into the ladies room.
823. Ladies, go into the men's room.
822. Forget to duck where there's low clearance.
821. Walk right into a clear glass door.
820. Mis-time stepping off an escalator.
819. Hand the police officer a credit card instead of your license.
818. Get in the wrong line.
817. Find out after you've been in the wrong line for a long time.
816. Press the wrong elevator button.
815. Go past the right channel using the TV remote.
814. Park outside the lines.
813. Mess up the drink order.
812. Tip with a smaller bill than you meant to.
811. Tip with a larger bill than you meant to.
810. Forget to tip.
809. Accidentally park in a handicapped spot.
808. Forget to release the emergency brake.
807. At a stop light, turn right into a parking lot so that you can exit at a green light and immediately be on your way—but mis-time it so that you have to wait for other cars, thus getting behind yourself in traffic.
806. Get ahead of yourself.
805. Shut the door on the seatbelt.
804. Shut the door on your hand.
803. Shut the door on someone else's hand.
802. Order a 12" sub at the computer kiosk when you meant to order the 6".
801. Enter the restricted area at Cape Canaveral.
849. Forget to dim your lights.
848. Let eggshell fall in with the eggs.
847. Lose the wedding ring.
846. Forget your ... uh ... you know, your ... oh, yeah—your point!
845. Staple your finger.
844. Open the wrong side of the milk carton.
843. Burn your marshmallow.
842. Drop the toothpicks.
841. Or the sequins.
840. Or the ball bearings.
839. Belabor your point.
837. Beat a dead horse.
836. Make an analogy that's as bad as a popsicle in the rain.
834. Cut yourself opening a can.
833. Blow out the candle along with the match.
832. Hit a rock with the mower.
831. Cut yourself shaving.
830. Put your T-shirt on backwards.
829. Wear a T-shirt with graphics that shows through your dress shirt.
828. Pull out the gaz nozzle while it's still pumping.
827. Miss a check in your checkbook.
826. Forget to sign a check.
825. Accidentally throw the check in the trash.
824. Men, go into the ladies room.
823. Ladies, go into the men's room.
822. Forget to duck where there's low clearance.
821. Walk right into a clear glass door.
820. Mis-time stepping off an escalator.
819. Hand the police officer a credit card instead of your license.
818. Get in the wrong line.
817. Find out after you've been in the wrong line for a long time.
816. Press the wrong elevator button.
815. Go past the right channel using the TV remote.
814. Park outside the lines.
813. Mess up the drink order.
812. Tip with a smaller bill than you meant to.
811. Tip with a larger bill than you meant to.
810. Forget to tip.
809. Accidentally park in a handicapped spot.
808. Forget to release the emergency brake.
807. At a stop light, turn right into a parking lot so that you can exit at a green light and immediately be on your way—but mis-time it so that you have to wait for other cars, thus getting behind yourself in traffic.
806. Get ahead of yourself.
805. Shut the door on the seatbelt.
804. Shut the door on your hand.
803. Shut the door on someone else's hand.
802. Order a 12" sub at the computer kiosk when you meant to order the 6".
801. Enter the restricted area at Cape Canaveral.
Nov 4, 2006
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
900. Leave your marker uncapped.
899. Ask a woman when the baby is due ... and find that she's not pregnant.
898. Use a permanent marker on a dry-erase board.
897. Wipe your dirty hands on the towels that are only for display.
896. Show up at what you thought was a costume party.
895. Lean too far back in your chair.
894. Realize that your father actually didn't want you to say that one more time.
893. Show up at the test with only Number 1 pencils.
892. Use a permanent marker on a dry-erase board.
891. Pinch your finger in your ring binder.
890. Get a paper cut.
889. Stand behind a mule.
888. Sing the wrong verse in the hymn.
887. Realize after the storm begins that your windows are down.
886. Finish wrapping the gift and then lose track of which person it's for.
885. Let the impossible-to-see end of the packaging tape fall back on the roll.
884. Reach for the doorknob ... after building up static walking on carpet.
883. Learn that you overloaded a cardboard box ... by having the bottom collapse.
882. Switch to live TV ... and then learn that your son was in the process of selecting a bunch of recorded program to delete ... a function that you weren't even aware of.
881. Make fun of a joke before it's over.
880. Shave one sideburn higher than the other.
879. Crack a tooth tightening the lace on your baseball glove.
878. Tie your necktie so that the part in back is longer than the part in front.
877. Botch the place setting.
875. Leave marker ink on the table right through the paper.
874. Open a soda that's all shaken up.
873. Burn the toast.
872. And the eggs.
871. Let the cat out of the bag.
870. Not to mention spill the beans.
869. Steal the bookmark that you thought your mate wasn't using.
868. Leave the curling iron on.
867. Bat the ball through a window.
866. Open your car door into someone else's.
865. Yell BINGO when you only have BING.
864. Roll a gutter ball.
863. Spike the ball into the net.
862. Leave your lavalier microphone on while you use the restroom.
861. Miss the bottom step.
860. Leave the water running.
859. And realize it after you return from vacation.
858. Overseas.
857. Try to eat just one Lay's potato chip.
856. Forget to save.
855. Hesitate.
854. Blink.
853. Lose your cool.
852. Shut the barn door when the cows are gone.
851. Don't stop and smell the roses.
899. Ask a woman when the baby is due ... and find that she's not pregnant.
898. Use a permanent marker on a dry-erase board.
897. Wipe your dirty hands on the towels that are only for display.
896. Show up at what you thought was a costume party.
895. Lean too far back in your chair.
894. Realize that your father actually didn't want you to say that one more time.
893. Show up at the test with only Number 1 pencils.
892. Use a permanent marker on a dry-erase board.
891. Pinch your finger in your ring binder.
890. Get a paper cut.
889. Stand behind a mule.
888. Sing the wrong verse in the hymn.
887. Realize after the storm begins that your windows are down.
886. Finish wrapping the gift and then lose track of which person it's for.
885. Let the impossible-to-see end of the packaging tape fall back on the roll.
884. Reach for the doorknob ... after building up static walking on carpet.
883. Learn that you overloaded a cardboard box ... by having the bottom collapse.
882. Switch to live TV ... and then learn that your son was in the process of selecting a bunch of recorded program to delete ... a function that you weren't even aware of.
881. Make fun of a joke before it's over.
880. Shave one sideburn higher than the other.
879. Crack a tooth tightening the lace on your baseball glove.
878. Tie your necktie so that the part in back is longer than the part in front.
877. Botch the place setting.
875. Leave marker ink on the table right through the paper.
874. Open a soda that's all shaken up.
873. Burn the toast.
872. And the eggs.
871. Let the cat out of the bag.
870. Not to mention spill the beans.
869. Steal the bookmark that you thought your mate wasn't using.
868. Leave the curling iron on.
867. Bat the ball through a window.
866. Open your car door into someone else's.
865. Yell BINGO when you only have BING.
864. Roll a gutter ball.
863. Spike the ball into the net.
862. Leave your lavalier microphone on while you use the restroom.
861. Miss the bottom step.
860. Leave the water running.
859. And realize it after you return from vacation.
858. Overseas.
857. Try to eat just one Lay's potato chip.
856. Forget to save.
855. Hesitate.
854. Blink.
853. Lose your cool.
852. Shut the barn door when the cows are gone.
851. Don't stop and smell the roses.
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
953. Hit the panic button on your key remote instead of the unlock button.
952. Forget that you have a key remote until you reach the car.
951. Wear your shoes on the wrong feet.
950. Forget to silence your cell phone in a movie.
949. Forget that you stashed your gum on the arm of a chair.
948. Over-nuke a hot dog.
947. During do-it-yourself assembly, install a part backwards.
946. Discover that you install the part backwards when you're nearly done.
945. Bite your tongue.
944. Let a fish that you caught jump out of your boat.
943. Spill your milk.
942. And then cry about it.
941. Tilt your head the wrong way as you move in for a kiss.
940. Tilt your body the wrong way as you move in for a hug.
939. Accidentally offer your left hand for a handshake.
938. Miss a belt loop.
937. Write the date with the previous year (happens a lot in January).
936. Place something in the fridge so that if falls out the next time you open the door.
935. After grocery shopping, leave the ice cream in the car on a warm day.
934. Leave a video in a hot car and discover it after it's warped.
933. Overfill your glass.
932. Lose your grip on your helium balloon.
931. Forget to shake the ketchup and get a blast of only that watery stuff.
930. Open your hot dog bun too wide and end up with two pieces.
929. Drive on the wrong side of the road when in a foreign country.
928. Get out the wrong side of an amusement park ride.
927. Fly a kite into a tree.
926. Forget your line in a play.
925. Mount a horse facing backwards.
924. Push the wrong button(s) in a vending macine.
923. Drop your keys down a storm drain.
922. Or into the trash.
921. Tee up ... and miss the ball completely.
920. Hit a sand trap.
919. Hike through poison ivy.
918. Discover sour milk and put the jug back in the fridge.
917. Wave to someone waving your way ... and discover the wave is for someone else.
916. Let housepaint splatter.
915. Lick a frozen flagpole.
914. Leave your food in reach of a hungry dog.
913. Forget to turn on your microphone.
912. Or get too close to your microphone.
911. Hit "9" for an outside line, then "1" for long distance ... then "1" again.
910. Lose track of where your garden hose is pointed.
909. Accidentally switch your headlights to highbeam as another car approaches.
908. Accidentally leave a baseball stadium without getting your hand stamped for re-entry.
907. Leave the lens cap on.
906. Put your T-shirt on backwards.
905. Go past the right time when setting a digital clock.
904. Let go of your sled at the top of the hill.
903. Bring mom aspirin for her aching back ... and then realize that you just stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.
902. Leave the game because your team doesn't have a chance to win ... and learn later that they came from behind to win.
901. Pull too hard on the potato chip bag.
952. Forget that you have a key remote until you reach the car.
951. Wear your shoes on the wrong feet.
950. Forget to silence your cell phone in a movie.
949. Forget that you stashed your gum on the arm of a chair.
948. Over-nuke a hot dog.
947. During do-it-yourself assembly, install a part backwards.
946. Discover that you install the part backwards when you're nearly done.
945. Bite your tongue.
944. Let a fish that you caught jump out of your boat.
943. Spill your milk.
942. And then cry about it.
941. Tilt your head the wrong way as you move in for a kiss.
940. Tilt your body the wrong way as you move in for a hug.
939. Accidentally offer your left hand for a handshake.
938. Miss a belt loop.
937. Write the date with the previous year (happens a lot in January).
936. Place something in the fridge so that if falls out the next time you open the door.
935. After grocery shopping, leave the ice cream in the car on a warm day.
934. Leave a video in a hot car and discover it after it's warped.
933. Overfill your glass.
932. Lose your grip on your helium balloon.
931. Forget to shake the ketchup and get a blast of only that watery stuff.
930. Open your hot dog bun too wide and end up with two pieces.
929. Drive on the wrong side of the road when in a foreign country.
928. Get out the wrong side of an amusement park ride.
927. Fly a kite into a tree.
926. Forget your line in a play.
925. Mount a horse facing backwards.
924. Push the wrong button(s) in a vending macine.
923. Drop your keys down a storm drain.
922. Or into the trash.
921. Tee up ... and miss the ball completely.
920. Hit a sand trap.
919. Hike through poison ivy.
918. Discover sour milk and put the jug back in the fridge.
917. Wave to someone waving your way ... and discover the wave is for someone else.
916. Let housepaint splatter.
915. Lick a frozen flagpole.
914. Leave your food in reach of a hungry dog.
913. Forget to turn on your microphone.
912. Or get too close to your microphone.
911. Hit "9" for an outside line, then "1" for long distance ... then "1" again.
910. Lose track of where your garden hose is pointed.
909. Accidentally switch your headlights to highbeam as another car approaches.
908. Accidentally leave a baseball stadium without getting your hand stamped for re-entry.
907. Leave the lens cap on.
906. Put your T-shirt on backwards.
905. Go past the right time when setting a digital clock.
904. Let go of your sled at the top of the hill.
903. Bring mom aspirin for her aching back ... and then realize that you just stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.
902. Leave the game because your team doesn't have a chance to win ... and learn later that they came from behind to win.
901. Pull too hard on the potato chip bag.
Nov 2, 2006
1002 ways to goof up (continued)
958. Spill your drink.
957. Drop the food off your plate.
956. Photocopy the blank side of the paper.
955. Wash white clothes with colored clothes.
954. Fall out of bed.
957. Drop the food off your plate.
956. Photocopy the blank side of the paper.
955. Wash white clothes with colored clothes.
954. Fall out of bed.
Nov 1, 2006
And so it begins ...
Today, we begin the list of the Top 1002 ways to deserve to hear "Ya Goof!"
1002. Make a Top 1002 List when you meant to make it the Top 1001.
1000. Misnumber.
999. Lose your keys.
998. Lose your car in the parking lot.
997. Leave your lights on.
996. Forget to zip up.
995. Wear different color socks.
994. Misplace your glasses.
993. Forget your towel when you go to the gym.
992. Forget sunscreen.
991. Go to the wrong address.
990. Dial the wrong number.
989. Call your kid by the wrong name.
988. Grap the wrong hand.
987. Take the wrong seat in the movie theater.
986. Forget to have them hold the mayo on the sandwich for (insert name here).
985. Misbutton.
984. Oversleep.
983. Mistake salt for sugar.
982. And vice-versa.
981. Show up for an event on the wrong day.
980. Step in dog poop.
979. Go to the wrong movie theater.
978. Add 1 cup instead of 1 tablespoon.
977. And vice-versa.
976. Repeat yourself without meaning to.
975. Repeat yourself without meaning to.
974. Mispel.
973. Go all lysdexic.
972. Drink from the wrong glass.
971. Walk right into someone.
970. Scrape someone's fender.
969. Take the wrong coat.
968. Forget to set your clock back.
967. Or forward.
966. Start counting down and forget and start counting up.
965. Forget that last one.
964. Forget to record an important show.
963. Cut the Christmas tree to 65" inches instead of 6'5".
962. Overtighten a bolt and crack the toilet that you're installing.
961. Cut a board too short.
960. Forget (insert name here)'s birthday.
959. Accidentally delete your list of 1002 ways to goof up. (Previous items reconstructed.)
1002. Make a Top 1002 List when you meant to make it the Top 1001.
1000. Misnumber.
999. Lose your keys.
998. Lose your car in the parking lot.
997. Leave your lights on.
996. Forget to zip up.
995. Wear different color socks.
994. Misplace your glasses.
993. Forget your towel when you go to the gym.
992. Forget sunscreen.
991. Go to the wrong address.
990. Dial the wrong number.
989. Call your kid by the wrong name.
988. Grap the wrong hand.
987. Take the wrong seat in the movie theater.
986. Forget to have them hold the mayo on the sandwich for (insert name here).
985. Misbutton.
984. Oversleep.
983. Mistake salt for sugar.
982. And vice-versa.
981. Show up for an event on the wrong day.
980. Step in dog poop.
979. Go to the wrong movie theater.
978. Add 1 cup instead of 1 tablespoon.
977. And vice-versa.
976. Repeat yourself without meaning to.
975. Repeat yourself without meaning to.
974. Mispel.
973. Go all lysdexic.
972. Drink from the wrong glass.
971. Walk right into someone.
970. Scrape someone's fender.
969. Take the wrong coat.
968. Forget to set your clock back.
967. Or forward.
966. Start counting down and forget and start counting up.
965. Forget that last one.
964. Forget to record an important show.
963. Cut the Christmas tree to 65" inches instead of 6'5".
962. Overtighten a bolt and crack the toilet that you're installing.
961. Cut a board too short.
960. Forget (insert name here)'s birthday.
959. Accidentally delete your list of 1002 ways to goof up. (Previous items reconstructed.)
Oct 27, 2006
D'oor!
A couple Saturdays ago, I took out a window air conditioner and carried it out the front door. It's a big bulky thing, so I couldn't see where I was going, and I scratched the door on the way out. See? Sigh.
Keith, Ya Goof!
Oct 26, 2006
Our son, the Cokehead
Here's Emmett in this year's Halloween costume, adapted from a prop that I made back in high school. We added a little stability by stuffing a partially-inflated beachball behind his head.Two words: Proud. Pop.
Oct 21, 2006
Meet Katherine the Smart
Submitted by our new friend Lisa, who wins fantastic chocolate from McIntyre's Candies! Thanks, Lisa!
My daughter Kate, at nine years of age, is the bright one in the family, while her six-year-old brother is the funny guy. Back in June, we were looking for a new home and had just finished touring one when Kate pipes up with "Mom, I bet I know the last name of the people who used to live here." Then she proceeds to spell MIRROR from the box she is looking at beside their mailbox. (We don't get our paper delivered). After I stopped laughing, I explained to her that that was where the newspaper goes.
So Kate, you still get straight A's, but Mom's got to say: Ya Goof!
Oct 18, 2006
Don't tell me I threw it out with the office party video
I've seen this story in a number of places, but I still don't know whether it's actually true ...
NASA lost the original tapes of the first man on the moon?!
If so, someone deserves to hear, REALLY, REALLY LOUD: Ya Goof!!
NASA lost the original tapes of the first man on the moon?!
If so, someone deserves to hear, REALLY, REALLY LOUD: Ya Goof!!
Oct 5, 2006
Remember me? At Meineke?
I needed an oil change, so I decided to drop my car at Meineke in the morning and get it in the evening. I asked my ol' work pal Carl to pick me up and drop me off.
Even though last time we arranged the same thing, he forgot me.
I remembered that after he did it again today.
Carl, Ya Goof!
Note: The picture above is not the local Meineke. The similarity is: Carl's not there, either.
Oct 1, 2006
Holy Shirtnapping, Batman!
This story has two parts.
PART 1
A few weeks ago, a shirt appeared in our basement, on the clothesline where we hang laundry after it comes out of the dryer. It was a Batman-oriented shirt, used but still nifty. I'm the Bat-fan of the family, so I thought maybe Janet and/or the kids had come across it in a second-hand shop and brought it home. It hung on the line for a while, and no one claimed it, so I thought that must be the case. I never did actually inquire about it; I just wore it one day around the house, and no one said anything contrary, so that was that. Or so I thought.
PART 2
It so happened that after church today, (a) I wore the shirt and (b) we had guests for part of the afternoon, brothers Gabe and Kendrick Imler. Gabe is in sixth grade, like Emmett, and Kendrick is age five. Janet picked up a pizza for dinner, and everyone was seated around it at the kitchen table when I came in. It was the first that Gabe or Kendrick had seen of me.
"Hey!" Kendrick said. "My brother has a shirt just like that!"
That's when it first occurred to any of us that Gabe must have left the shirt behind the last time that he slept over. He and I happen to wear about the same size.
"Hmm," said Gabe, quickly latching on. "Have you ever been to Six Flags New England?" (which is where the shirt hailed from.)
"Er ... no," I said. The jig was up.
Above you see Gabe reunited with his shirt. I guess Janet must have made an assumption similar to mine (that the shirt came from a second-hand shop) when she put the shirt in the laundry.
Keith, Ya Goof!
Sep 29, 2006
ThINK next time!
Reminder to self: Don't put a red felt tip pen in your shirt pocket ... Ya Goof!
Like you did today.
Somewhere along the way, I learned to use hair spray in a case like this. It keeps the ink from setting into the cloth.
Probably my mom taught me that.
The shirt is soaking right now in water and Oxi-Clean.
(To be continued)
Like you did today.
Somewhere along the way, I learned to use hair spray in a case like this. It keeps the ink from setting into the cloth.
Probably my mom taught me that.
The shirt is soaking right now in water and Oxi-Clean.
(To be continued)
Sep 27, 2006
Bus-ted
Ethan had an away soccer game last night. It was the team's fifth straight shutout, so when the bus stopped at Burger King on the way back, the defense got to get off and order first. Ethan plays defense.
But that's not the story here.
Ethan called from the road. He does that so he can get prompt pickup service when the bus reaches the junior high.
"Where are you now?" I said.
"Where are we?" Ethan asked of the bus at large. "What, Skip?" I heard. The answer was coming by way of Ethan's friend Justin Skipper. "Huntingdon," Ethan said.
Okay, that meant about twenty-five minutes. About twenty minutes later, I drove down and waited.
And waited.
And waited.
After about half an hour, still no bus. Accident? Or ...
I went home, figuring that Ethan would call again.
A few minutes later, he walked in the door.
"Skip's dad dropped me off," he said. "When I called, we were actually in Clearfield." About thirty miles farther out than Huntingdon.
The list of navigators who I trust just got shorter.
Ethan and Skip, Ya Goofs!
Image scarfed from clearfield-county.com.
Sep 23, 2006
Vote 4 Emmett
If any of you readers have a vote in the student council election at Charles W. Longer Elementary in Hollidaysburg, it's only fair that you have full information about this candidate.
On the one hand, he thought of a nice way to create a campaign sign (with Dad's help)--a gigundous paper chain with writing on it.
On the other hand, he gave the impression that he needed to have this on Friday morning, making Dad late for work, and then revealed that he didn't need it until Monday.
Vote 4 Emmett! Even if he does sometimes make us say: Ya Goof!
On the one hand, he thought of a nice way to create a campaign sign (with Dad's help)--a gigundous paper chain with writing on it.
On the other hand, he gave the impression that he needed to have this on Friday morning, making Dad late for work, and then revealed that he didn't need it until Monday.
Vote 4 Emmett! Even if he does sometimes make us say: Ya Goof!
Sep 19, 2006
Talk about a long bad spell
Today I learned that I've been spelling my niece's nickname incorrectly for all of her life.
Bethany is 23. Here she is with boyfriend Ryan.
That's a small thing, I know, but I've always been a strong speller and had a taste for the fine details of words. Yet here was a matter that had escaped me for literally a lifetime.
Buggs (note correct spelling!) would roll her eyes that I'm commenting on this. She might even say: "Uncle Keith, Ya Goof!"
Bethany is 23. Here she is with boyfriend Ryan.
For some reason, we've always called her "Buggany." Naturally, this shortens to "Buggs." That's how Bethany signed an email that she sent me today.
And that's when I realized that I've always handled the spelling as "Bugs." You know, like this character:
That's a small thing, I know, but I've always been a strong speller and had a taste for the fine details of words. Yet here was a matter that had escaped me for literally a lifetime.Buggs (note correct spelling!) would roll her eyes that I'm commenting on this. She might even say: "Uncle Keith, Ya Goof!"
Sep 18, 2006
Caution: Kids at Work
These young men are huge fans of work.They could sit back and watch it all day.
Aw, that's not fair to say. Dad, Ya Goof!
What you see is the project to refurbish the bike rack in front of the Hollidaysburg Area Public Library. It was sunken into the ground, and the paint was ragged. Not any more!
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